went for my follow-up check up today (it seems that there's nothing else to talk about)
and...
I AM FINE!
nothing's wrong with me,
physically I'm healthy as I can ever be! yay!!! :)
I'm 19,
and when I get news that I'm 100% healthy, the first thing I'd want to do is get out of home (which has been medically proven that I'm fit enough to do so) and go somewhere to see my friends and forget that I was ever sick.
BUT!!
if one were to surround himself/herself with such overbearing ________ *coughcough* icantnamenames
so naturally when I say things like, "nothing's wrong with me!"
the instant response I get would be, "nothing's wrong with you... yet."
ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
yet, the final word was that everything was strictly psychological
apparently I have Cyclothymia,
google it, wiki it,
I don't care anymore.
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
Sunday, July 18, 2010
so this is what happened
Tuesday- I got up from an afternoon nap and felt incredibly sore. I thought it might've been because I got up too sudden, meaning that my body was still asleep yet I still kept on walking. that night I had no appetite.
Wednesday- because I didn't eat much the previous night my stomach felt so uncomfortable during the morning class. and I felt like fainting every hour of that day. that night, my appetite came back and I had a very big meal. it seemed as if my body was rejecting it so I threw up once, my stomach was hurting like hell and the rest of my body ached every time I tried to move particularly around my chest, shoulders, back and legs. I came down with a fever that night.
Thursday- the fever went down although I was still a little bit aching. I went home that day and decided not to go for a check up because I didn't have a temperature anymore.
Friday- I went about my normal activities. everything was fine except for the fact that every time I ate, I had a tiny bit of difficulty to breathe, my stomach hurt after every meal and it felt like solid food was stuck inside my chest.
Saturday- zero fever but I was unsatisfied because I was still aching after so many days. I went to the hospital in hopes of getting some medication to fix this fast and I'll be in great shape by Monday, meaning my body hurting will no longer restrict my normal activities. I stayed there longer than I thought because they did an x-ray and found out my both my lungs were slightly deflated :( thus, I was admitted for overnight observation.
*sighs* not in the mood to go into detail.
Wednesday- because I didn't eat much the previous night my stomach felt so uncomfortable during the morning class. and I felt like fainting every hour of that day. that night, my appetite came back and I had a very big meal. it seemed as if my body was rejecting it so I threw up once, my stomach was hurting like hell and the rest of my body ached every time I tried to move particularly around my chest, shoulders, back and legs. I came down with a fever that night.
Thursday- the fever went down although I was still a little bit aching. I went home that day and decided not to go for a check up because I didn't have a temperature anymore.
Friday- I went about my normal activities. everything was fine except for the fact that every time I ate, I had a tiny bit of difficulty to breathe, my stomach hurt after every meal and it felt like solid food was stuck inside my chest.
Saturday- zero fever but I was unsatisfied because I was still aching after so many days. I went to the hospital in hopes of getting some medication to fix this fast and I'll be in great shape by Monday, meaning my body hurting will no longer restrict my normal activities. I stayed there longer than I thought because they did an x-ray and found out my both my lungs were slightly deflated :( thus, I was admitted for overnight observation.
*sighs* not in the mood to go into detail.
Friday, July 16, 2010
nurfarah ain
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this is Nurfarah Ain,
I call her Farah,
when typing I'll call her "Fawwa"
and when I go french I call her "Ferra!!"
haha! jk :P
we've been in the same classes together ever since our first day in matriculation,
even our names were next to each other on the attendance list
Nur Syafiqah? "Here!"
Nurfarah Ain? "Here!"
we sat next to each other for three straight semesters,
then we were off to Gombak where we still managed to get all of our classes together.
except for the last short sem,
she was in the morning class,
I took the afternoon one (lazy me)
but still it was the same subject so we could relate.
anyway, that's not going to happen anymore.
cause recently she got accepted into TESL
she was thrown across the pond!
like literally there's a river dividing between the two departments :P
and I'm sooo happy for her!
congratulations!
then it suddenly hit me how different it's going to be without her.
I mean for me, I've never gone through a really serious time academic-wise without having her to talk to.
especially from our time in Nilai,
I remember when we were both so stressed out by assignments,
so freaked out by results,
when it was literally the two of us cramming to get it done.
we both panicked,
freaked out like hell about some of the workload we had.
even though those aren't the best memories,
I still cherish them because I went through them with you babe :)
when I panic, you were there for me,
when you panic, I tried my best to help you,
we helped each other out because we were going through the exact same thing.
now I don't know how I'm going to face that anymore,
I'm so used to your own reaction when we get so crazy during the climax of each semester.
it's going to be sooo different,
especially for core courses...
because until today I have never experienced working on a core course assignment where you're not there with me,
we seem to always agree when it comes to work ethic.
again, I'll say it's going to be so weird without you,
this semester,
it's going to be so weird going to phonology classes,
it's going to be so weird doing drama work without you,
most of all, it's going to be so weird to not dribble notes especially to you when I'm bored in class,
it's going to be weird not hearing you complain that you're sleepy in class,
it's going to be weird not complaining to you when I'm sleepy in class.
it'll be so weird when I'll no longer be able to watch you when you sleep in class haha! (freaky much)
oh God, I'm gonna miss you so much I might just go crazy!
but it's okay babe,
it's not like we're never going to see each other,
it's just never going to be the same,
suddenly I'll feel a pang of emptiness when I sit in class and naturally put my bag on the chair next to me to wait for you but know that you're never coming :(
okay, that's enough,
I'm not gonna be sad about this,
it's just one small change,
one tiny change is not going to alter this friendship of ours!
I just want to say that I'm so proud of you for reaching for your dream!
dream on babe!
"If you want something in this world, just reach out and grab it"
Never give up
I believe in you
I miss you
I love you
and plus, it's not all bad,
I still have this chick :D
by the way,
yesterday was her birthday
and even though I already wished her twice
I would still like to do it again here
happy birthday orange freak!
omg! you're twenty now! I can't believe it! haha!
FYI I love you too
Thursday, July 15, 2010
because I can
2 posts in 1 night?!
I do it because I can!
and also because I'm sick and the laptop screen is making my head ache and I want cookies and Riley and lots of other things that I can't have bla bla bla.
so anyway,
today I got home and stayed there alone for the whole day.
when the working people (mom and bro) finally got home at night I joined them for a late dinner.
Mom was talking about her Iranian students and bro was also mentioning about successful Iranians he has met in the office (and how incredibly beautiful they are)
the only thing I can add to the conversation that was even close to the topic which was apparently Iranians was "Riley has an Iranian girlfriend!"
I had to say Riley,
if I said his real name Xavier Samuel no one in that room would know who he is and I was too lazy to explain haha!
but I didn't even say that lol
I just added that yeah they're beautiful,
some of them even become beauty queens (Xavier's gf is an Iranian born European beauty queen)
*sniff sniff* I smell blood! haha!
Edward who? Jacob what?
GO TEAM RILEY GO!
he will always be alive in my heart!!! (where the baby wolf didn't eat him lol)
random and hot and cute :)
I also read something about a fan page on facebook that Xavier's family created for him.
A fan has expressed that she is not pleased with this page because the family posts private pics of him with his gf
I haven't found it yet, I'm sure the one I'm currently liking is not the same one being mentioned here (that one doesn't have pics)
but I don't know if this story is even true.
a family will not do stuff like that.
I do it because I can!
and also because I'm sick and the laptop screen is making my head ache and I want cookies and Riley and lots of other things that I can't have bla bla bla.
so anyway,
today I got home and stayed there alone for the whole day.
when the working people (mom and bro) finally got home at night I joined them for a late dinner.
Mom was talking about her Iranian students and bro was also mentioning about successful Iranians he has met in the office (and how incredibly beautiful they are)
the only thing I can add to the conversation that was even close to the topic which was apparently Iranians was "Riley has an Iranian girlfriend!"
I had to say Riley,
if I said his real name Xavier Samuel no one in that room would know who he is and I was too lazy to explain haha!
but I didn't even say that lol
I just added that yeah they're beautiful,
some of them even become beauty queens (Xavier's gf is an Iranian born European beauty queen)
*sniff sniff* I smell blood! haha!
Edward who? Jacob what?
GO TEAM RILEY GO!
he will always be alive in my heart!!! (where the baby wolf didn't eat him lol)
random and hot and cute :)
I also read something about a fan page on facebook that Xavier's family created for him.
A fan has expressed that she is not pleased with this page because the family posts private pics of him with his gf
I haven't found it yet, I'm sure the one I'm currently liking is not the same one being mentioned here (that one doesn't have pics)
but I don't know if this story is even true.
a family will not do stuff like that.
twilight cookbook
some recipes and vids ;)
Twilight Red Velvet Vampire Cookie Recipe
1(18.25 ounce) box red velvet cake mix
¼ cup canola oil
½ cup mayonnaise
2 eggs or egg substitute
2 cups old fashioned oatmeal
1 cup white chocolate chips
Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
In a large bowl, combine the oil, mayonnaise and eggs.
Mix well.
Stir in the cake mix and oatmeal.
Add the white chocolate chips.
Roll the dough into 1 - 1 1/2" balls.
Drop onto ungreased cookie sheets.
Bake for 8 - 10 minutes, don't overcook.
Cool on cookie sheet one minute.
Transfer to wire racks to finish cooling.
Store tightly covered.
Vampire Cookies
3/4 cup butter, softened
1/2 cup sugar
1 large egg
1/2 tsp vanilla extract
1/8 tsp almond extract
1 1/2 cups all purpose flour
1/4 tsp salt
approx 1/2 cup red jam (raspberry/strawberry)
In a large bowl, cream together butter and sugar until light. Beat in egg and extracts.
Add flour and salt to the bowl and mix them into the butter-sugar mixture at low speed until dough is just combined. Wrap dough in plastic wrap and refrigerate for at least 1 hour.
Preheat oven to 325F.
Divide dough in half and keep the portion you are not using in the refrigerator.
Roll dough out on a lightly floured surface until it is about 1/8-inch thick. Use a cookie cutter to cut out 2-inch rounds.
Place rounds on a baking sheet, put a teaspoon of jam on each of them and cover with another round of dough. Press edges down lightly, pinching the edges onto the cookie sheet. Use a toothpick and poke two small holes (like a vampire bite) in the top of each cookie.
Bake for 10-12 minutes, until cookies are set.
Cool for about 5 minutes on the baking sheet, then transfer to a wire rack to cool completely.
Dip a toothpick in some extra red jam and re-insert in the “bite” holes you made before baking to emphasize them, if not already red. Draw a blood trick down from one of the bites with the jam, if desired.
Cookies are best the day they are made.
Makes 2 dozen.
Vampire Cupcakes
2 cups cake flour
1 1/3 cups sugar
1 tsp baking powder
1/2 tsp baking soda
1/2 tsp salt
1/2 cup butter, room temperature
2 large egg whites
1 cup buttermilk
1 tsp vanilla extract
1/4 tsp almond extract
Preheat oven to 350F. Line muffin tins (you will need 18 cups total) with paper liners and set aside.
Sift together cake flour, baking powder, baking soda and salt into the bowl of an electric mixer. Add sugar and blend, using the paddle attachment (You can use a hand mixer, too).
Cut butter into 4 or 5 chunks and drop into the bowl with the flour mixture.Blend on low speed until mixture looks sandy and no large chunks of butter remain, 1-2 minutes.
In a large measuring cup, combine eggs, buttermilk, vanilla and almond extracts. Beat lightly with a fork until combined. With the mixer on low, pour 1 cup of the buttermilk mixture into the bowl. Turn speed up to medium and beat for 1 1/2 minutes. Reduce speed back to low and pour in the rest of the buttermilk mixture. Continue to beat at low speed for an additional 30 seconds, until liquid is fully incorporated. Scrape down the sides of the bowl and beat for a few more seconds, if necessary.
Divide evenly into prepared muffin tins, filling 18 cups as equally as possible.
Bake for 16-20 minutes, until cupcakes are light golden and a toothpick inserted into their centers comes out clean. The cake should spring back when lightly pressed.
Turn cupcakes out onto a wire rack to cool completely.
Makes 18 cupcakes.
Filling
1 can cherry pie filling
Puree cherry pie filling – a syrupy mix of sugar and cherries, usually – in a food processor until fairly smooth. Very small pieces of cherries are ok.
(A photo how-to of the assembly method can be found here.) Take a cooled cupcake and, using a small pairing knife, cut a cone of cake (1-inch across by 1-inch deep) out of the top. Trim off the pointy end of the cone, leaving a flat circle of cake. Set aside and repeat this process for all the cupcakes.
Take the cherry filling and spoon about tablespoon or so into each cupcake cavity, filling it almost to the top with filling. Top off with the flat circle of cake you just removed to seal the hole and hold the “blood” filling in place.
Marshmallow Frosting
(previously used on Peanut Butter Banana Cupcakes)
1 1/2 cups sugar
2 large egg whites, room temperature
1/3 cup water
2 tsp light corn syrup
1/4 tsp cream of tartar
1 tsp vanilla extract
Whisk sugar, egg whites, 1/3 cup water, light corn syrup, and cream of tartar in large metal bowl to blend. Set bowl over saucepan of barely simmering water (do not allow bottom of bowl to touch simmering water). Using handheld electric mixer, beat on medium speed until mixture resembles soft marshmallow fluff, about 5-7 minutes.
Increase mixer speed to high and beat until mixture is very smooth and thick, about 3 minutes longer. Remove bowl from over simmering water. Add vanilla extract and continue beating until marshmallow frosting is completely cool, about 5-7 minutes longer.
Assembly
Using a butter knife or a small offset spatula, frost each cupcake with a layer of the cooled marshmallow frosting by placing a dollop of icing in the center of the cupcake (on top of the cut out circle of cake) and spreading from the center to the sides of the cupcake.
Dip a wooden toothpick or skewer into some leftover cherry pie filling and poke two fang-holes, about 3/4 inch apart, in the frosting on one side of the cupcake. Dribble a little extra filling from the holes for effect.
Repeat until all cupcakes are frosted and decorated. You will probably have frosting leftover for another batch if you are baking more.
Makes 18 vampire cupcakes.
sources: http://www.bitebella.com, http://bakingbites.com and youtube duh!
Twilight Red Velvet Vampire Cookie Recipe
1(18.25 ounce) box red velvet cake mix
¼ cup canola oil
½ cup mayonnaise
2 eggs or egg substitute
2 cups old fashioned oatmeal
1 cup white chocolate chips
Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
In a large bowl, combine the oil, mayonnaise and eggs.
Mix well.
Stir in the cake mix and oatmeal.
Add the white chocolate chips.
Roll the dough into 1 - 1 1/2" balls.
Drop onto ungreased cookie sheets.
Bake for 8 - 10 minutes, don't overcook.
Cool on cookie sheet one minute.
Transfer to wire racks to finish cooling.
Store tightly covered.
Vampire Cookies
3/4 cup butter, softened
1/2 cup sugar
1 large egg
1/2 tsp vanilla extract
1/8 tsp almond extract
1 1/2 cups all purpose flour
1/4 tsp salt
approx 1/2 cup red jam (raspberry/strawberry)
In a large bowl, cream together butter and sugar until light. Beat in egg and extracts.
Add flour and salt to the bowl and mix them into the butter-sugar mixture at low speed until dough is just combined. Wrap dough in plastic wrap and refrigerate for at least 1 hour.
Preheat oven to 325F.
Divide dough in half and keep the portion you are not using in the refrigerator.
Roll dough out on a lightly floured surface until it is about 1/8-inch thick. Use a cookie cutter to cut out 2-inch rounds.
Place rounds on a baking sheet, put a teaspoon of jam on each of them and cover with another round of dough. Press edges down lightly, pinching the edges onto the cookie sheet. Use a toothpick and poke two small holes (like a vampire bite) in the top of each cookie.
Bake for 10-12 minutes, until cookies are set.
Cool for about 5 minutes on the baking sheet, then transfer to a wire rack to cool completely.
Dip a toothpick in some extra red jam and re-insert in the “bite” holes you made before baking to emphasize them, if not already red. Draw a blood trick down from one of the bites with the jam, if desired.
Cookies are best the day they are made.
Makes 2 dozen.
Vampire Cupcakes
2 cups cake flour
1 1/3 cups sugar
1 tsp baking powder
1/2 tsp baking soda
1/2 tsp salt
1/2 cup butter, room temperature
2 large egg whites
1 cup buttermilk
1 tsp vanilla extract
1/4 tsp almond extract
Preheat oven to 350F. Line muffin tins (you will need 18 cups total) with paper liners and set aside.
Sift together cake flour, baking powder, baking soda and salt into the bowl of an electric mixer. Add sugar and blend, using the paddle attachment (You can use a hand mixer, too).
Cut butter into 4 or 5 chunks and drop into the bowl with the flour mixture.Blend on low speed until mixture looks sandy and no large chunks of butter remain, 1-2 minutes.
In a large measuring cup, combine eggs, buttermilk, vanilla and almond extracts. Beat lightly with a fork until combined. With the mixer on low, pour 1 cup of the buttermilk mixture into the bowl. Turn speed up to medium and beat for 1 1/2 minutes. Reduce speed back to low and pour in the rest of the buttermilk mixture. Continue to beat at low speed for an additional 30 seconds, until liquid is fully incorporated. Scrape down the sides of the bowl and beat for a few more seconds, if necessary.
Divide evenly into prepared muffin tins, filling 18 cups as equally as possible.
Bake for 16-20 minutes, until cupcakes are light golden and a toothpick inserted into their centers comes out clean. The cake should spring back when lightly pressed.
Turn cupcakes out onto a wire rack to cool completely.
Makes 18 cupcakes.
Filling
1 can cherry pie filling
Puree cherry pie filling – a syrupy mix of sugar and cherries, usually – in a food processor until fairly smooth. Very small pieces of cherries are ok.
(A photo how-to of the assembly method can be found here.) Take a cooled cupcake and, using a small pairing knife, cut a cone of cake (1-inch across by 1-inch deep) out of the top. Trim off the pointy end of the cone, leaving a flat circle of cake. Set aside and repeat this process for all the cupcakes.
Take the cherry filling and spoon about tablespoon or so into each cupcake cavity, filling it almost to the top with filling. Top off with the flat circle of cake you just removed to seal the hole and hold the “blood” filling in place.
Marshmallow Frosting
(previously used on Peanut Butter Banana Cupcakes)
1 1/2 cups sugar
2 large egg whites, room temperature
1/3 cup water
2 tsp light corn syrup
1/4 tsp cream of tartar
1 tsp vanilla extract
Whisk sugar, egg whites, 1/3 cup water, light corn syrup, and cream of tartar in large metal bowl to blend. Set bowl over saucepan of barely simmering water (do not allow bottom of bowl to touch simmering water). Using handheld electric mixer, beat on medium speed until mixture resembles soft marshmallow fluff, about 5-7 minutes.
Increase mixer speed to high and beat until mixture is very smooth and thick, about 3 minutes longer. Remove bowl from over simmering water. Add vanilla extract and continue beating until marshmallow frosting is completely cool, about 5-7 minutes longer.
Assembly
Using a butter knife or a small offset spatula, frost each cupcake with a layer of the cooled marshmallow frosting by placing a dollop of icing in the center of the cupcake (on top of the cut out circle of cake) and spreading from the center to the sides of the cupcake.
Dip a wooden toothpick or skewer into some leftover cherry pie filling and poke two fang-holes, about 3/4 inch apart, in the frosting on one side of the cupcake. Dribble a little extra filling from the holes for effect.
Repeat until all cupcakes are frosted and decorated. You will probably have frosting leftover for another batch if you are baking more.
Makes 18 vampire cupcakes.
sources: http://www.bitebella.com, http://bakingbites.com and youtube duh!
Sunday, July 11, 2010
a true nerd having a fit entry
*forgive me for I have a nerdy side,
and this is how technical she can get she's seriously pissed off about studies*
hello home, I'm back!
and what a way to come back!
by being greeted by subjects to be added for the new semester!
the semester hasn't even started yet and I'm already having a headache!
after coming back from my exciting yet tiring getaway,
I was hoping to take some time to chill before I was up and running again,
after all, I'm not a robot, I can't function 24/7
I've been home for less than 48 hours and I'm already being thrown back into there!
but then time waits for no man.
I really thought I wasn't going to stress about this,
I honestly believed that was possible considering I had already made sure that I wouldn't be stressed out by this earlier on!
you see, there's this thing called pre-registration.
by doing that, I was able to organize & arrange (same thing) according to my liking and thus solving future problems that may occur.
it's also provided so students will get the time to think before they jumped into something,
in a soothing, privileged and well thought manner.
well it looks like even though I did that it still proved to be USELESS!
I've already pre-registered the subjects I wanted as well as the time which I desired to take them,
I had 5 subjects, my classes were from 8:30am to 12:50pm every Monday to Thursday,
it was suppose to help, it was suppose to ensure of my position, it was suppose to stay the same, it wasn't suppose to change.
but it did.
so when the actual date for registration came, two things made my mind explode:
1. my 5 subjects turned into 4, which meant one of them magically disappeared without even thinking of the consequences!
2. my schedule changed. while 4 subjects remained, the days and times were all over the place thus ruining my intention of sticking to those days and times!
this is what I did at first,
I added one more subject to the time that I needed to fill,
it was easier to add than I thought,
even though it wasn't the subject I particularly wanted to take for this semester,
at least it was during the time that I needed to fill.
then I had to change my plan,
because the subject that magically disappeared
happened to be the subject that I NEEDED to take for this semester!
so in the end I had to drop one & add one in order to maintain my 15 hour per week for classes.
I think the maximum is 19, minimum 15. I took the minimum.
I'm not lazy,
it's that for once I wanted to be able to feel content in uni, just for once...
ever since I first started,
every semester has been stressed filled to the max,
and the useless pre-registration was suppose to help me get the subjects I wanted in the time I wanted so that I can be happy with my life there for once.
but no,
apparently I'm not allowed to be happy,
I'm not allowed to get the classes I want so I that I can feel like this is actually what I want to do.
I'm so pissed off that I had to drop creative thinking so that I could add phonetics & phonology.
a few months ago during the pre-registration,
I had both perfectly,
now I have to sacrifice one :'(
so in the end, this is what I'll be taking this semester (July-November 2010 I think)
Mass Communication, Monday-Wednesday, 8:30-9:50
Drama, Monday-Wednesday, 11:30-12:50
Phonetics & Phonology, Monday-Wednesday, 2-3:30
Prophetic History, Monday-Wednesday, 10-11:20
Sciences of Hadith, Tuesday-Thursday, 8:30-9:50
anyway, going back to the topic of how horrible I sound because I'm not happy with uni life,
it's not that I've been totally unhappy and losing my mind everyday since I began my journey,
I've just been sleepwalking all the way through,
I'm talked about sleepwalking being a metaphor for myself in previous entries so I'm not going to explain what it means.
on and on and on, it just seems to never go my way or the way I planned,
there's always something there to make me tick,
nothing ever falls completely into place,
and all I could do is hold it all in.
and I'm good at it,
I maintain my studies at an average level,
I haven't completely freaked out,
I can still be patient until today.
I guess I should say that I'm only doing this for the sake of it,
my heart is not truly in it yet.
doesn't mean that I haven't been passionate about some of the good things that have happened,
I'm thankful that my results aren't awful which is definitely something to celebrate about even if they're not flying colors.
I just wish that I can truly feel my reason for being there,
and know why I put up with it day by day.
if you'd ask me why I keep tormenting myself like this,
why don't I just go and do what I what I truly want to do,
I'd tell you,
"It's because I have nothing to fall back on, and if I'm not grateful then that makes me an ass."
that's why I was really hoping to get the schedule that I wanted,
so that I could figure out what I really want to do,
so that I could build something to fall back on,
and find the time to learn to love being in the environment instead of feeling like it's forced on me.
so that I could at least feel content with what's been dropped on my lap and be grateful without feeling any guilt.
okay, enough with the heavy,
the things that got me through were these...
there's too much hotness in this pic!
I've never encountered a picture where it contained both of the guys I truly admire!
Xavier Samuel & Charlie Bewley,
both are twilight vampires but aren't given enough credit,
because everybody is too busy fighting about Team Edward & Team Jacob.
I've watched Eclipse and I agree with some of the reviews I've read,
if it weren't for Xavier (he plays Riley) the movie would have been dead
Go Team Riley!
and I'm following Charlie on Twitter :)
his Tweets are crazy, he's crazy and if you read his Tweets and take a look at his personality, you'll understand that he is one of a kind.
I really don't like that they are being overshadowed,
because they both put so much work into it,
Xavier did research for his character which had very little resources,
Charlie built an entire back story for his character and he only gets one or two lines in the movies :(
but nonetheless,
I'm so happy that these pics are 2 in 1!
and here's another 2 in 1 pic that made me feel a little bit better
Mitch Hewer and Alex Pettyfer.
I must say, even though this is 2 in 1,
I don't really like this pic.
it just looks like they are succumbing to the pressures of looking good,
so it looks like they don't eat, they look tired and there's less yummy going on this this pic
Alex eat! please eat!
Mitch get some sleep!
Anyway, I always think that these young English boys have an exclusive club of performers where they exclude Robert Pattinson,
because he's basically working in the US now while they're still doing the same kind of material ever since they started acting, singing, dancing etc.
one thing I like about them,
it actually looks like they are a bunch of friends and they stay friends, hang out together all the time,
and they do the kind of series & movies that have the same taste and original tone to it.
skins, tormented... you name it, they're in it :)
then they go on to do another project with the same group of young actors with slightly the same theme.
and it's so cute because they're also friends.
like I said, it's a club lol
and this is how technical she can get she's seriously pissed off about studies*
hello home, I'm back!
and what a way to come back!
by being greeted by subjects to be added for the new semester!
the semester hasn't even started yet and I'm already having a headache!
after coming back from my exciting yet tiring getaway,
I was hoping to take some time to chill before I was up and running again,
after all, I'm not a robot, I can't function 24/7
I've been home for less than 48 hours and I'm already being thrown back into there!
but then time waits for no man.
I really thought I wasn't going to stress about this,
I honestly believed that was possible considering I had already made sure that I wouldn't be stressed out by this earlier on!
you see, there's this thing called pre-registration.
by doing that, I was able to organize & arrange (same thing) according to my liking and thus solving future problems that may occur.
it's also provided so students will get the time to think before they jumped into something,
in a soothing, privileged and well thought manner.
well it looks like even though I did that it still proved to be USELESS!
I've already pre-registered the subjects I wanted as well as the time which I desired to take them,
I had 5 subjects, my classes were from 8:30am to 12:50pm every Monday to Thursday,
it was suppose to help, it was suppose to ensure of my position, it was suppose to stay the same, it wasn't suppose to change.
but it did.
so when the actual date for registration came, two things made my mind explode:
1. my 5 subjects turned into 4, which meant one of them magically disappeared without even thinking of the consequences!
2. my schedule changed. while 4 subjects remained, the days and times were all over the place thus ruining my intention of sticking to those days and times!
this is what I did at first,
I added one more subject to the time that I needed to fill,
it was easier to add than I thought,
even though it wasn't the subject I particularly wanted to take for this semester,
at least it was during the time that I needed to fill.
then I had to change my plan,
because the subject that magically disappeared
happened to be the subject that I NEEDED to take for this semester!
so in the end I had to drop one & add one in order to maintain my 15 hour per week for classes.
I think the maximum is 19, minimum 15. I took the minimum.
I'm not lazy,
it's that for once I wanted to be able to feel content in uni, just for once...
ever since I first started,
every semester has been stressed filled to the max,
and the useless pre-registration was suppose to help me get the subjects I wanted in the time I wanted so that I can be happy with my life there for once.
but no,
apparently I'm not allowed to be happy,
I'm not allowed to get the classes I want so I that I can feel like this is actually what I want to do.
I'm so pissed off that I had to drop creative thinking so that I could add phonetics & phonology.
a few months ago during the pre-registration,
I had both perfectly,
now I have to sacrifice one :'(
so in the end, this is what I'll be taking this semester (July-November 2010 I think)
Mass Communication, Monday-Wednesday, 8:30-9:50
Drama, Monday-Wednesday, 11:30-12:50
Phonetics & Phonology, Monday-Wednesday, 2-3:30
Prophetic History, Monday-Wednesday, 10-11:20
Sciences of Hadith, Tuesday-Thursday, 8:30-9:50
anyway, going back to the topic of how horrible I sound because I'm not happy with uni life,
it's not that I've been totally unhappy and losing my mind everyday since I began my journey,
I've just been sleepwalking all the way through,
I'm talked about sleepwalking being a metaphor for myself in previous entries so I'm not going to explain what it means.
on and on and on, it just seems to never go my way or the way I planned,
there's always something there to make me tick,
nothing ever falls completely into place,
and all I could do is hold it all in.
and I'm good at it,
I maintain my studies at an average level,
I haven't completely freaked out,
I can still be patient until today.
I guess I should say that I'm only doing this for the sake of it,
my heart is not truly in it yet.
doesn't mean that I haven't been passionate about some of the good things that have happened,
I'm thankful that my results aren't awful which is definitely something to celebrate about even if they're not flying colors.
I just wish that I can truly feel my reason for being there,
and know why I put up with it day by day.
if you'd ask me why I keep tormenting myself like this,
why don't I just go and do what I what I truly want to do,
I'd tell you,
"It's because I have nothing to fall back on, and if I'm not grateful then that makes me an ass."
that's why I was really hoping to get the schedule that I wanted,
so that I could figure out what I really want to do,
so that I could build something to fall back on,
and find the time to learn to love being in the environment instead of feeling like it's forced on me.
so that I could at least feel content with what's been dropped on my lap and be grateful without feeling any guilt.
okay, enough with the heavy,
the things that got me through were these...
there's too much hotness in this pic!
I've never encountered a picture where it contained both of the guys I truly admire!
Xavier Samuel & Charlie Bewley,
both are twilight vampires but aren't given enough credit,
because everybody is too busy fighting about Team Edward & Team Jacob.
I've watched Eclipse and I agree with some of the reviews I've read,
if it weren't for Xavier (he plays Riley) the movie would have been dead
Go Team Riley!
and I'm following Charlie on Twitter :)
his Tweets are crazy, he's crazy and if you read his Tweets and take a look at his personality, you'll understand that he is one of a kind.
I really don't like that they are being overshadowed,
because they both put so much work into it,
Xavier did research for his character which had very little resources,
Charlie built an entire back story for his character and he only gets one or two lines in the movies :(
but nonetheless,
I'm so happy that these pics are 2 in 1!
and here's another 2 in 1 pic that made me feel a little bit better
Mitch Hewer and Alex Pettyfer.
I must say, even though this is 2 in 1,
I don't really like this pic.
it just looks like they are succumbing to the pressures of looking good,
so it looks like they don't eat, they look tired and there's less yummy going on this this pic
Alex eat! please eat!
Mitch get some sleep!
Anyway, I always think that these young English boys have an exclusive club of performers where they exclude Robert Pattinson,
because he's basically working in the US now while they're still doing the same kind of material ever since they started acting, singing, dancing etc.
one thing I like about them,
it actually looks like they are a bunch of friends and they stay friends, hang out together all the time,
and they do the kind of series & movies that have the same taste and original tone to it.
skins, tormented... you name it, they're in it :)
then they go on to do another project with the same group of young actors with slightly the same theme.
and it's so cute because they're also friends.
like I said, it's a club lol
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